There’s a reason why I put the word “closure” in quotation marks. Probably because we all know that the concept of going back to an ex to talk through a break up and find closure before moving on for good is a total scam. Nine out of ten times it goes wrong and backfires on us.

I totally get wanting to talk things through. I know, girl. You want to iron out all the finer details of the relationship. You want him to fully understand how he hurt you and to point out all the things that he did wrong. Or maybe you just want him to give you a full cost analysis as to why he chose to break up with you and for him to explain the mathematical equation he used to come to that final conclusion.

I know because I’ve been there. I’ve sent texts highlighting the ways that he hurt me and the things that he did wrong – just in case he didn’t know ALL the ways that he had let me down. It’s crazy to think that I was the one sending him that list yet he was the one who broke up with me.

But the thing is that I never felt better after sending those texts. I told myself that I was sending them so that I’d have peace of mind and get closure but I never felt better after sending them (even though I tried to convince myself that I did) and, worst of all, he didn’t even respond!

I know other women who’ve set up meetings with their exes or even gone back to their exes’ homes to further “discuss” the breakup and leave with the “closure” that they felt they needed. Most of the time, they just left feeling worse than before. Either they experienced a moment of weakness and slept with the guy who no longer wanted to be with them or he didn’t give them the answers that they were looking for. Now they’re an emotional wreck and crying in front of a man who is looking at them uncomfortably. Oh, Sally. Why?

Ladies, this is the sign that you were waiting for. DO NOT go back looking for closure. Pick yourself up, hold your head high, and move on with your life like the boss babe that you are.

Related Topics: going back to your ex, does my ex owe an explanation after break up, moving on from a relationship