Relationships require sacrifice and compromise but sometimes the things we do for love are simply outrageous. We recently had game night with the girls and this question popped up in one of the games: “What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done for a man?” Some of us bowed our heads in shame because we couldn’t believe the things we had done… so much for being woke bad bitches right?! Before I go any further, I would like to say that I was young and in love and I thought I had a future with these men, okay?! To be honest, I never told my friends about the things I had done because the level of embarrassment I felt is unmatched. Girlfriends, behold some of the crazy things I have done for love!

I am not the kind of person to feel bad for the decisions I make but some of these men didn’t deserve the things I did for them and also I think I was just downright naive. I was dating this man while at university and I was so in love. He was very supportive and very kind and often came to visit me at my hostel but here’s the kicker: I had never been to his house! I know better now. So this one time, he came to my hostel at 11pm and told me he had been thrown out of his place because his rent was past due and his bank was having issues. He asked if I could help out. I didn’t have any money but I had my tuition that I was meant to bank the next day. He begged me to give him the money and I gave in. It was probably the worst and dumbest decision of my life. After that day, I never heard from him or saw him again. The lesson here is don’t be paying no man’s rent!

You know how you look forward to spending New Year’s Eve with the man you think is the “one”?  Yes, that was me a few years ago. I met this man and honestly, he was in a bad place but like most 20 year olds, I suffered from the savior complex. I thought I could fix this man who had just had a horrible break up and it was my mission to make him whole (and happy) again. Again, I know how crazy this sounds but haven’t we all done some crazy things for men?  We decided to spend New Year’s Eve together and what was supposed to be a night of us having an awesome time turned into a night of me watching him call and plead with his ex to take him back as I sat in the chair across the room. When he was done crying, I held him in my arms and consoled him. To this day I wonder what was wrong with me…it’s crazy! Anyway, don’t forget to fear men.

I remember this one time one of my exes needed his brother’s help so he lied to him that he had a pregnant girlfriend. I was not pregnant, so I decided to buy a pregnancy suit and pretend to be sick so that  we could get that money. We actually got the money and he bought me a Louis Vuitton bag. But we later broke up. I don’t know what he told his brother about the baby but we never talked about it again. I know for a fact that was extreme but you have to do what you can to hold your man down. This whole thing just reminded me of Cookie Lyon from the series Empire. I know that women can do the craziest things for the sake of love but Cookie really held Lucious down and fought for him but he  just had to go out and cheat on her. Y’all, I have done crazy things but Cookie Lyon craziness is where I draw the line.

As women, we are out here doing the most. In these streets we are raging feminists giving off strong, independent women energy and behind closed doors, we are simping. I thought I was the only one but my friends also had their fair share of crazy too.

For example, my friend Leila had disappeared from the group for a while and had cut off all communication with us. We were excited when she came by and boy, did she have a story to tell. She was dating a man that told her to cut off all her unmarried friends and she did. She was only allowed to be friends with her husband’s friends’ wives. She agreed to this for a few months but he still ended up cheating on her despite all the sacrifices she had made for their relationship. This example is a bit extreme and, in my opinion, borderline abuse but sis really agreed to all the man’s terms.

Another of my girls said she hadn’t shaved in a while because her man didn’t want her too. We were in awe. Why would you do that? She said she is doing it for her man and she doesn’t  mind it. Couldn’t be me! I have my waxing appointment booked as we speak!

Another friend, Sue, told us about how she pretended to be into extreme sports to please a man because he was the adventurous kind. She told him that she was into bungee jumping and other extreme activities yet, in reality, she is terrified of heights. Since she told the guy that she was into extreme adventures, for one of their dates, he organized a trip which included bungee jumping. She had to do it to prove to the man that she was “adventurous” but she said it was the worst experience of her life and one of the craziest things she has ever done for a man. The sad part is that they didn’t even end up dating for long!

Honestly, after my money got stolen by a man I thought loved me, something inside of me changed. The embarrassment of having to retell the story to my parents who later shared it with other relatives is something I will never get over. Occasionally, we joke about it. but that, for me, was rock bottom. I should have listened to my gut.

There are a lot of crazy things that we have done for love and some things that are just plain embarrassing and dumb. At the end of it all, sometimes it’s worth it and sometimes it simply is not. Most often than not though, the times that we do craziest things are the times that the man is not even worth. But anyway…who am I to judge?