Dear Peach and Flora,

I have been in a relationship for 3 years now. My ex recently showed up and said he would like us to be friends again. I honestly have no problem with it but the girls and my man don’t like the idea. We do have a 4-year-old daughter with my ex, but he walked out on us when I was 6 months pregnant. My man has raised and loved her like his own child. I feel like if we became friends my daughter could build a relationship with her father. What should I do? 

Lucy

Dear Lucy,

Thank you for reaching out to us. There is a reason this man is your ex and I suggest you keep it that way. If you have a good thing going with your current man, there is no reason to bring your ex back into the picture even as a friend. Sometimes exes get jealous when they see you have moved on and you’re happy without them.

He might have genuine intentions but, if he hasn’t reached out to you for the past 3 years, Sis!! That’s a red flag already. It takes time for people to realize what they lost and, when they do, they will do whatever it takes to get you back. I suggest that, to rule out any chances of spoiling what you have now, try to stay away from your ex.

I know you have a daughter together and letting her know who her father is  important but you can’t guarantee he won’t walk out on her again. Before you let him into her life he has to prove himself first. It may be very devastating for your child when she gets to know him and he just disappears again. If your current man has been with your daughter and has done a great job, keeping it that way would be a safer option.

Think of yourself and the life you and your man have built for your daughter. Not everyone can be a great dad. I hope everything works out for you dearie.

All the best!