As we approach the new year, a lot of us are doing an audit of the past year to see what changes we want to make going forward. You might be at a different stage of your life where you feel a shift in how you view the world and which people you now want around you. When you look closely at the people in your life, you might realize that you’ve outgrown a few of them.

One of the hardest things to do is a relationship audit. I feel like a lot of us (myself included) find it hard to let go of people that we’ve known or been close to for a long time because the familiarity is comfortable. But growth is uncomfortable, my friends. Growth is uncomfortable.

I know you probably don’t want to hear this as we get ready to usher in the new year with fireworks and champagne, but it might be time to let that man go if:

• He’s very selfish and only cares about his needs without ever considering what your needs are.
• He drags you down with his pessimistic views on life.
• He doesn’t show any growth. I.e., He’s the same person that he was 3 years ago yet you’ve been doing the work to better yourself.
• He blames everyone and everything around him for his failures and doesn’t take any responsibility.
• He has no definite plan for your future. Every time you bring up a long-term commitment (i.e., marriage), he changes the subject.

If you read any of the above statements and you felt triggered or found yourself nodding your head in agreement, it’s time to do what you know needs to be done and end the relationship. I know it’s not easy and I know that it’s not something you want to think about during the festive season, but there’s really no need to carry dead weight into the new year. You don’t necessarily need to break up with him right now. You could give it a little time to think things through and meditate on it but, at the end of the day, your happiness and growth should be a priority.

We need to make room for what we really want, and we can only do that when we are able to let go of the things that no longer serve us and drag us down.

So this is me raising my glass to you. You’ve made it this far and you’ve survived this year despite all the obstacles that life might have thrown at you. May you enter the new year with an abundance mentality while knowing that you are beautiful, you are worthy of love, and you deserve the very best that life has to offer. Happy New Year!